Stop me before I torture someone

Now let’s get this straight: the former Bush administration openly admits to having tortured prisoners, only it wasn’t really torture because the Fat Man says it wasn’t and Dick Cheney thinks it was so nice that it got good information for the U.S. (which is odd because it wasn’t torture) and in fact it was so nice that the Fat Man thinks Nancy Pelosi should undergo waterboarding, which raises the question why he doesn’t volunteer to try it himself.  It might be even better than Viagra, after all.  Now, is that because waterboarding isn’t torture, or because it is?  I lost track.  So, apparently,  has everyone else.

Anyway, I am no fan of Nancy Pelosi.  But I’m not a fan of this bullshit, either.

Nancy Pelosi is currently being blamed by the Right because she failed to stop the Bush administration from torturing prisoners, which they say they weren’t doing, or that waterboarding isn’t torture, or that they were getting good information they wouldn’t have gotten otherwise because they were regularly giving the prisoners these nice, horizontal showers.  And of course, after a certain point no one could stop the Bush Administration from doing whatever the hell they wanted to, because they just went ahead and did it anyway.  In the name of God, of course.

So what the hell is Nancy Pelosi being blamed for?  (5/18/09 update: maybe it’s this — apparently the Republicans now want Pelosi to apologize to them because she said the CIA lied to her; either that, or she has to prove that the CIA lied to her…and then apologize to the Republicans.  Oh, excuse me.  Now they’re not only the paragons of perfection, but also judge and jury.  And here I was thinking the Republicans should apologize to us for all the crap they’ve put us through since 1980 or so.  I suppose I should beg their pardon, but I won’t.)

I’ve never blamed Pelosi for anything more than being a giddy liberal who is about as helpful to her country as is Newt Gingrich.  Both are bought-and-paid-for corporate pawns.  They just express themselves differently.  Gingrich, for example, might by some stretch of the imagination be guilty of actually approving torture — he’s that sort of wild and crazy ultraconservative wingnut guy — but the same thing is definitely stricken from bleeding-heart tree-hugger Pelosi’s uniform.  Which just makes all this finger-pointing an even more a stupid, shameful waste of time.

So, are you sitting there scratching your head?  Good.  Because so am I.

Like I just said, the only torture going on right now is this twisted, illogical crap that’s being foisted on the rest of us while as usual, nobody in Washington D.C. gets anything done.

My only wish is that they shut up and get on with their lives.  We can’t be concerned specifically about torture anymore because the people who were responsible for it — the Bush Administration — are tongue-twisting their way out of being held responsible, which robs us of the satisfaction of seeing them held responsible for anything at all.  They are attempting to add waterboarding to the lost list of disasters that they weren’t responsible for that, oddly enough, happened between 2000 and 2008.   That was an era when, if I remember correctly, there was a Republican administration in the White House and for a long time a Republican majority in Congress, and the Democrats were a minority party stumbling about in utter disarray, much as the Republicans allegedly are now.  Yet only the Democrats were responsible for anything bad that happened during the Bush administration– and it seems like most of what happened in that period was very, very bad.  Interesting.

Which is to say that the current scheme of blaming Nancy Pelosi shouldn’t be allowed to fly.  If they weren’t torturing anyone, no one is to blame — not even the Ultimate Liberal herself.

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