Meanwhile back in la-la-land

You probably know that Rod Blagojevich was convicted of exactly 1 of approximately 20-gazillion counts of whatever.  The jury hung on the other counts because of one juror.  All of the rest were ready to convict him on all counts.  That’s hardly a cause for Blags to celebrate.

Of course, reality is lost on Blags: he’s now claiming that this means he’s “vindicated” and that he possibly has a political future.  I’m sure the national media, especially Fox News which seems to root for all that would harm the U.S., will grab onto that claim and pitch it to the nation, never mentioning how questionable the claim is.

Blags’ trial was marked by Fox-ish grandstanding and reality-show stunts.  The last and saddest attempt to win the jurors’ sympathy, the Blags’ “Take Your Daughter to Court Day” during which one of the daughters wore a totally-inappropriate little black cocktail dress that matched her mother’s totally inappropriate little black cocktail dress, had the opposite effect on a number of them.  One said that he/she thought the Blags were bad parents for doing so.  I just wonder if the Blags clan hoped the jury was populated by pedophiles.  You see, the daughter in question is all of about 14 years old.

Sooner or later, one has to believe that reality will catch up with the Blags clan in a way that even they can’t twist or outright deny.  But in the meantime, He Who is Banned from Holding Public Office in Illinois is starting to crow that he has a political future.

All I can say is, as far as I’m able to tell, Blags’ popularity among Illinoisans is approximately the same as his popularity with that jury.  Plus, like I just said, the Illinois Legislature banned him from public office here — and that’s a life sentence.

If he has a political future, it ain’t in Illinois.  I reckon Wisconsin, Iowa and Indiana had better watch out.  (Missouri and Kentucky, I think you’re safe…he wouldn’t dare venture that far south.)

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Turkeys Is Us

Where do they find these people?  That’s all I want to know.

What?  The Illinois Republican party.  (Where?  Illinois, presumably, although they never have seemed to be very clear on that.)  And who?  Bill Brady.  For what?  Governor.

For what, again?  Village Idiot.  Of an entire state.

Why?  Well, because we got rid of the last village idiot (Blagojevich) and I guess the Republicans have decided that even though one of their own (George Ryan) is currently in federal prison on corruption charges…well, that happened a few years ago, you see, so they’re okay.  They’re still better than the Democrats because the whole thing with Blagojevich is more recent.  So there.

Mind you, this is the same party that imported Alan Keyes from another state to run against one Barack Obama for the U.S. Senate a few years back because he was (1) blacker than Obama, and (2) a batshit crazy conservative in contrast to Obama’s oh-so-evil liberalism, which has since, in their eyes, morphed into socialism.

Remember how well that worked out?  Oh YES!  And so they’re trying it AGAIN!

Only difference is that this time they’re running their (locally bred) uber-conservative slack-jaw against an almost equally lame Democrat — Pat Quinn, the guy who inherited the governor’s mansion after Blags was forced to vacate, and is currently taking it on the chin for all the problems Blags and his predecessor created.  So the Rebibs have about a snowball’s chance in purgatory instead of hell this time.

What’s so bad about Brady?  Well, he supposedly has some expertise in finance, but spends most of his time railing against gay rights and promoting animal cruelty.  That is to say, we haven’t heard anything but uber-right-wing crap out of him.  Sound familiar?  You know, kind of like that former beauty queen up in Alaska who yammers on and on about ANYTHING but a real idea?

Does this mean that, if elected, Brady will resign halfway through his term?  We can only hope.

Anyway, here’s my take: having gotten rid of a Mob-type set-up in Illinois government, the last thing we need is to replace it with a Fox News government.  The state simply can’t afford it.

And to the Illinois Republican Party: this is probably just the first of many, many Stupid of the Day Awards.  Take a bow, assholes.

Comparative Corruption

Okay, so I’m probably not going to get to the New Vocabulary article any time soon.  Stuff just keeps happening.

Big news today in the blogosphere is that some 3,000 pages of Alaska Governor Todd and wife Palin’s officially unofficial emails while in office have been released to the world by MSNBC.  I have nothing to add in that regard, except that I found their efforts to find an legitimate reason for Alaskans to pay one of their daughters’ travel expenses, along with the stuff about the tanning bed and the trampoline, to be very interesting. 

Being from Illinois, it brought back memories of the revelations of a year ago.  Ah, yes…Governor Blagojevich.  That guy who, in spite of the fact that he must have (on some level) realized the FBI was listening, tried to sell — over a land-line telephone, how old-fashioned — a Senate seat formerly belonging to the man he hates with a passion because that man is now in the White House, which is a place Blagojevich once aimed for but now merely covets.  He also tried to shake down an executive of a children’s hospital by threatening him with loss of state funding.   And there were numerous other goodies attributed to Blagojevich before his career came to a crashing halt.

Thing is, Blagojevich was impeached and removed from office.  Palin quit, some are guessing in order to bilk all the money she could out of her teabag-sucking acolytes before the storm hit.  And it seems now that the storm is finally getting ready to blow.  But will the fact that she quit ahead of the game, or the fact that the media and current U.S. politics love her right-wingnuttiness, serve as a buffer?  This has cushioned her in the past.

I’m asking because Blagojevich, alleged liberal savior-figure of the downtrodden (in his own mind, at least), has no cushion whatsoever except that most of the country thinks he’s funny in a tragic, D-list sort of way.  In spite of his repeated proclamation of love for the people of Illinois, we hate him.  It’s that simple.  We’re glad he’s gone.  Of course, we seem to have more or less immediately replaced him with an assortment of new and improved reptiles, but he himself is gone from our lives.

All these emails coming out in the same week as the revelation about Palin dodging property taxes on a luxury cabin or two and then appearing as the well-paid keynote speaker at the halfwit Wingnut Ball, has to be the stuff of a brewing left-wing media conspiracy controversy in the minds of her followers.  That’s what I’m afraid of, actually — that it will all be reduced to just that in the popular perception.

So what will be the fate of Palin?  I’m waiting, because the answer will tell me everything I need to know.

I hope no one reads this…

…I’m talking about Rod Blagojevich’s memoirs, entitled “The Governor.”  (I already know how many people read this blog — very few — which is fine with me because it leaves me free to say whatever I goddamn well please without worrying about yet another wingnut chasing me all over the Internet.)

No, I haven’t read it — the book  I mean — and I won’t because I refuse to buy it.  I won’t check it out of the library, either.    Won’t have to.  Why not?  Because the Chicago newspapers are already ripping it to shreds — every barf-bag word of it.  And apparently there’s quite a lot of barf between the covers.

We already knew from the time between his arrest and his impeachment that this guy had some serious delusional stuff going on, that he was comparing himself to Martin Luther King and Gandhi and even Jesus Christ. 

He also repeatedly declared his love for the people of Illinois.  I can say, as one of the people of Illinois, that the love was not returned by anyone living here legally.  Toward the end his approval ratings were almost in negative numbers, something I’ve never seen any politician accomplish before no matter how hard they tried, or rather, didn’t.  I wrote about this back in January:

Like I said, we’re not even sure what Blags is blathering about. I keep hearing things that sound like, “I am doing this for the people of Illinois.”

If that’s the case, here’s a message for Blags: Oh, thanks. Having you do it all for us is like having a car thief pull your Mercedes out of a ditch. The people of Illinois don’t want you, Rod. You’ve got a nearly 0% approval rating. That’s amazing. I’ve never heard of anything like that before. Even George Bush managed to hang on to about 20% of the delusionals in spite of the fact that he ignored warnings of a terrorist attack, started two hopeless wars, tortured prisoners, left a city in ruins, and finally sacked the global economy (the list goes on, but this article is not about Bush). All you’ve done, Gov, is be your obnoxious self and run the state into the poor house while cementing the notion that its name is synonymous with “corruption.” Nothing much in comparison to Bush’s accomplishments, but lookee — no one likes you. No one. You don’t even have George Bush’s 20% die-hard wingnut cushion against total anonymity. So stop being so nice to us, will you? Please?

What I said then still stands now.

Anyway, then Blags got a book deal, the proceeds of which were apparently not enough to pay off his legal bills, which sent him and his wife down the reality-TV/Elvis impersonator road.  You know, life beneath the D list.  The bottom below the bottom. 

As I remember, I wondered about this book.  He was saying back then that he was going to spill the beans on all those nasty people who were in with him on those nasty things he kept (not) doing for the love of Illinois.  I was wondering, if he were so innocent of any wrongdoing, how there could be any beans to spill.

Apparently that question has not been answered.  Blags still insists he’s as innocent as the Virgin Mary.  He probably thinks he is her as well.  So there’s no bean-spilling here; apparently there is only some schoolyard taunting.  Damn.  There goes any value the book may have had.

And because of this, all that’s become apparent to me in reading these advance book burnings is that we’re dealing with someone who has some serious, serious reality issues.  If he were a Republican, I expect that would not bar him from public office.  After all, there is no shame that can’t be overcome by shouting “pro-life!”   Doubt it?  Look at Sarah Palin, Blagojevich’s closest Republican counterpart.  Everything we hear about her just makes her seem weirder and weirder, which is pretty bad because she seemed weird to a lot of people to start with.  By all rights she should have reached the sub-basement a long time before Blags did, but yet she still has her true believers and Fox News still tries to hint that she can be President in 2012. 

Not so for Blags, who is a Democrat, which means he is really and truly finished as a politician and any dreams he ever entertained of living in the White House are gone for this lifetime.  It’s all his fault; there is no one else to blame, there is no Democratic equivalent of Fox News, and there is no hardcore group of salivating muttonheads for him to fall back on. 

And that’s just fine with me.  Enough, already.  If there is one conclusion to be drawn from this, it is that the people of Illinois have earned some peace.  Long may we enjoy it.

Blagojevich………………………..Reality

Blagojevich and reality.  Ah, such a reality gap.

Every time he steps in the public eye lately, I see the unreality dripping from his every pore.    Think of it:

Impeachment…..Media Tour

Indictment…..Disney World

Arraignment…..Reality Show?

Yep, you read the last one right.  The ex-Gov is now looking to star on a reality show, with Nancy Kerrigan.  You know, the ice skater who got whacked in the knee back in 1994 by the buddies of that other ice skater — you know, the one who was a trailer park queen and has since taken up a career in wrestling.

Oh, how far ice skating has fallen.  But for Blags, such a venture seems pretty much on the level with the rest of his career.  He has no idea how a politician should even appear to behave.  Then again, how does that differentiate him from many members of the Republican Party and their followers, as witnessed in yesterday’s “tea parties?” 

Yikes — more reality gap.  Blags is a Democrat.

Unfortunately for us reality-gap fans, his new venture into “reality” may be met with actual reality.  You see, the show is being shot in Costa Rica, and Blags’ passport has been taken away.  It’s up to a judge to decide whether Blags can debase himself further, even in the pursuit of a paycheck, and at this point whether that will happen is a very iffy prospect.

Oh, by the way…I forgot.  Blags is writing a book, too.  Good thing, because it’s supposed to be a tell-all, which interests me because the ex-Gov keeps insisting that there is nothing to tell because he is innocent.  I’m looking forward to seeing that one get straightened out.

Trouble is, he didn’t get much of an advance for the book.  Boo Hoo. 

And so it’s come to this.  A reality show.  Our public figures, our politicians, our leaders have become something on a level with the guests on Jerry Springer (who, ironically, used to be a politician).

I can’t even say that reality has been turned upside down anymore, because these days, it seems like there is none.  I don’t cry for the politicians, though.  I cry for the rest of us.  But I can’t tell if the tears are out of genuine sadness, or just happen because I am laughing so hard.

Oh, the reality gap of it all.

Dignity

I’ll work on this post later.  For now, suffice it to say that the newspapers today were reporting that ex-Gov Blags is looking to appear on a reality TV show, and I cannot let that one pass without comment.

In the meantime, on quite another subject…well, maybe not such another subject because it also involves the issue of “dignity,” enjoy this:  Daily Show.

The Illinois Senate Gong Show

I don’t have to post much about this because you probably already know that Rod Blagojevich is now soon-to-be-forgotten history here in Illinois.

I watched his last speech just before the state Senate did their thing. It was so beyond pathetic that I am, for a change, at a loss for words. He went on and on about “why didn’t you impeach me in my first term,” and the only answer I can think of is, “possibly because George W. Bush was still in office and he actually made you look good.”

Anyway, it’s all over but the courtroom drama. Like I said before, enough. And to paraphrase what someone long ago said after the last of the conspirators in the assassination of Abraham Lincoln was hanged: “we want to know his name no more.”